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Dont Taz Me Bro! My Up Close and Personal Taser Experience

By: Mike Meroney

Most of us have seen police using EMDs’ Electronic Mechanical Devices commonly know as Tasers either on prime time news or reality shows like Cops.
This past weekend I had the opportunity to actually experience what it feels like when we watch a suspect falling to the ground screaming and begging for mercy.

I think we see enough of this on T.V. that we become a little callous and look at it as entertainment and not understanding how much pain can be inflicted when those two shiny little probes stick in a target and 50,000 volts are sent through the body.
Well let me share the love with yall.

I am here to testify that the initial response from the instant the Taser is applied to the mille second that the button is released is “PAIN!” Can I be any more succinct?
As Dr. Phil queries from time to time” What the hell were ya thinking?”
I must admit that even at 65 I am still a bit of an adrenalin junkie and I thought that a good Tasering would be better than a cup of double espresso at 10:00 AM to get the creative juices flowing.

I was attending a conference this past weekend that focused on Personal Self Defense Products. A presentation on the use and effectiveness of the Taser or Electronic Mechanical Device was on the agenda.

A training officer from the local police demonstrated the use and handling of the device and after she was done with the presentation she called the volunteers to the front of the class. We had already signed waivers, clue, and were as ready as we could be.

She, the instructor, attached 2 little shiny metal probes to the back and on the shirt of victim, volunteer number one. We all watched and the officer stepped back counted down from three. Three- two - one- scream. We all jumped a little and then watched volunteer number one do this mini convulsion thing for a couple of seconds. We all were a little surprised at the obvious effect this was having on volunteer number one and as soon as it started, it was over. Volunteer number one was falling to his knees and the two spotters, one on each side, caught him. It took about 3 seconds for him to come back to reality. He shook his head, we all laughed, me uncomfortably, for I was next.

Me? I'm different. She, the instructor asks how many seconds would I
like to experience. I feel like I’m in the old Woody Allen movie “Sleeper”.
I reply in my most manly voice and with as much bravado as I could muster up “5 seconds should be fine.” Just enough to show what a man I am and just short enough as not to expose my inner wimp.

I feel the little shiny probes being attached to my back. Then I know she, the instructor, is stepping back. I wait for that countdown and without any 3-2-1 thing I’m up on my toes frozen stiff, excruciating pain from my scalp to my toes which I now think are facing straight up. After my bodies first response and the pain my next reaction was to do something cute like yell “STOP Please-No More”. My inner wimp shows up and in front of about 100 people.

I can hear Dr. Phil’s voice along with the committee again with the” What the hell were you thinking?” question. I am thinking as I try to shake off the effects of about 50,000 volts and 18 amps of power. This is ok, this is ok I try to tell myself. “How many seconds?” I ask her, the training officer. “Oh about 3 seconds” she replies with this cute little grin. She got me and she knows it.

So as I think EGO is now spelled ego and I laugh with the rest of the crowd and walk not totally on firm ground back to my seat with the rest of the class.

Dr. Phil was right but I can boast to the world that I am now an expert and an authority in the effects of the Electrical Mechanical Device we all know as Taser.
One more check off the bucket list.

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Mr. Meroney has been involved various phases of Public Safety for over 25 years. Mike Meroney is the owner of Beach Street Security, an internet based company providing personal security and child safety products to the public. For more information please visit www.beachstreetsecurity.com

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